Rotten Tomatoes has put out a list of the worst hundred films of the last ten years. Such lists are usually generated as linkbait, to provoke disgruntled nerds and cinephiles to post rebuttals and whinge about the ranking. I'm not about to buck the trend, though I must say I was surprised to find I'd seen only three on their list, as I've seen a lot of terrible movies (dear god, so much bad horror).
Basic Instinct 2
Not a good film, certainly, but no worse than a hundred other straight-to-DVD sweatshop-produced erotic thrillers. I saw this film because a genial but peculiar man used to stalk me on my morning bus route; when I googled his business card, he turned out to be an actor with an imdb page listing this film. But I couldn't see him in it anywhere.
Godsend
Yes, this was a tremendously disappointing film. But it's not the 57th worst film of the last ten years.
Alone in the Dark (2005)
Alone in the Dark (2005)
Listed at number fifteen, and though I admittedly haven't seen the other fourteen—apparently worse!—films, I do consider this a contender for Worst Film Of All Time.
I make this claim with some confidence because Alone in the Dark is so bad it's almost not even a film at all. "Director" Uwe Boll purchases props, hires actors and technicians, and pays someone to "write" something in the general format of a screenplay. Having done so, he shouts "Action!", and seems to think this assembly is all that's required to make cinema. I call it "cargo cult cinema," as Boll has tried to "imitate the superficial exterior of a process or system without having any understanding of the underlying substance". It's really, really amazing(ly terrible). I've never seen a film like it, and if it weren't so soul-crushingly boring, I'd suggest you see it just as an object of curiosity.
But it isn't, and I don't, and you shouldn't. You definitely shouldn't.
